10 Ideas On What To Talk About On Your First Date With A Guy
While first dates can be thrilling and fun, they can also be awkward and terrifying. Are you wondering what to talk about on your first date with a guy to avoid such tension?
So you know this guy and you’re about to go on your first date. The idea is to click with him and possibly find someone special. But what if you run out of things to chat about after the first few minutes? What if, in an effort to keep the conversation going, it turns out to be like a job interview?
It’s all good!
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In this article, I will show you 10 amazing conversation ideas, so that you know what to talk about on your first date with a guy more confidently.
You won’t have to struggle with those awful uncomfortable silences or tense pauses any longer. They’ll not only boost your first date by allowing you to bond with each other, but they’ll also increase your chances of getting date number two. So let’s dive right into this!
18 things to avoid doing on your first date
How to ask a guy out without being creepy
What to talk about on your first date with a guy
1. If you’re nervous
Pretending to be confident and intelligent on dates is common. If you suddenly forget what to talk about on your first date with a guy, just admit that you’re nervous. That can actually be a great topic and an icebreaker between you two.
Besides, being nervous is harmless, but embracing it is not. Unless you have a great relationship with the man, it’s rather normal to get nervous on your first date. It’s quite likely that he’s worried too. Knowing that can make you both feel more open and better.
Read more: Why don’t guys like you?
2. Favorite films, TV shows or books
On a first date, what should you chat about? This is one of the most fascinating subjects to discuss. Those who share similar tastes in movies, television shows or books tend to get along swimmingly.
If you’ve watched the same series, movies or read the same books, you’ll have a lot more to talk about. You may discuss and analyze your favorite seasons, episodes or chapters and situations with someone who has seen or read them as thoroughly as you have!
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3. Where you’re from
When you and the guy talk about your childhood memories, you may strengthen your relationship and discover more about one another. Talking about your hometowns, your family life, and facts from your upbringing may help offer fresh insights about each person. You’ll find out whether you’re from very similar or quite different backgrounds.
For example, even when you’re the youngest of three children and he’s an only child, you can discover that you still watch the same shows, play the same games, and attend the same summer camps.
4. Family and friends
Everyone has a family, so what to talk about on your first date with a guy? Of course, you can always use family as an easy topic to begin. Talking about his family can help you learn a lot more about your date.
Also, ask about his pals. Listen for intimate and long-term friends. ‘Close’ pals who are all new is always a bad omen. Unless he just moved, because making adult friends might be difficult. And, of course, a divorce adds to the complexities, so talk to get to know more about him.
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5. Bucket lists
By asking the guy what’s on his bucket list, you might discover a lot about his deepest aspirations, desires, and attributes. This is something that everyone possesses, whether they recognize it or not. After all, we all have our own desires, large and little, as human beings.
You never know what you’ll discover—maybe he wants to establish his own company, create a school for underprivileged children in Vietnam, or swim with sharks. Just don’t forget to listen attentively and you’ll learn a lot.
Read more: Should you kiss him on the first date?
6. A “good life” concept
We all have a vision of our ideal life. Your goal may be to purchase property, raise a healthy family, pay off debts, or win the next Big Brother. What’s it like for the person across the table?
Here’s a question you can ask him, “What would have happened in your life two years from now for you to declare ‘things are very good?’” And now for a crucial question: Do the things that will make him happy ring true for you?
Values often drive many of a person’s decisions. You should explore your date’s philosophical outlook. Is he spiritual or moral? Is it compatible? Does he volunteer his time or money to help the less fortunate or a cause that matters to him?
7. Deal breakers
If you don’t know what to talk about on your first date with a guy, here’s a topic that might not always make you happy, but it’s not less important. You should find out if there’re any deal breakers.
A liking for brunettes isn’t an issue. But some other things aren’t negotiable, like having kids or living in a certain place. If you’re very religious, ask about it. It’s better to bring up any issues that are off limits to you early on. Of course, you can tease them into it throughout the conversation, but it’s best to know sooner rather than later.
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8. Favorite music
Talking about his favorite music can reveal a lot about him, making it perfect among first date topics. Along with discovering common musical interests, you can broaden your own musical horizons by finding out your date’s favorite genres and bands.
A first date can help you discover new bands, and talking about music and shows can help you bond. You can chat about the best (and worst) shows you’ve ever seen or the performers you’d most like to see live.
Some people would love to explore the world their entire lives. Others would rather stay close to family and friends and make their forever home there. Find out what your date prefers.
This inquiry can also help you figure out if you’re compatible with him or not. If you both want to go, see if he prefers an outdoor experience or a city visit.
Read also: How to escape the friend zone with a guy
10. Something you can’t guess about the other
This is unquestionably one of the best topics to talk about on a first date. You should ask this question if you want your date to tell you something particularly intriguing and interesting about himself!
This is a roundabout way of asking him to tell you something special about himself, something that distinguishes him and highlights his uniqueness. It could be anything at all, from a unique interest in music or movies to a hidden hobby to major accomplishments he doesn’t brag about. You must also be prepared to respond to this question, as it is likely that he will ask you the same question!
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There you go, 10 topics if you have no idea of what to talk about on your first date with a guy. Any subjects to avoid? Here you go.
What should not be first date topics?
Politics, they say, is something that should never be discussed at the dinner table. The same can be said of the first date. It’s easy to become too enthused and even judgmental when you have strong thoughts or convictions. Of course, where your date stands on some issues is crucial for a long happy relationship, but it’s better to wait a few dates before getting into political debates.
Work and employment may be discussed freely. However, would you be delighted if someone asked you how much money you made, if you own your home or rent it, or what sort of vehicle you drive? That type of question makes it appear as though the only thing someone is interested in is how much money you’ll spare for them. Asking about his job is fine, but stay away from his salary even when you don’t know what to talk about on your first date with a guy.
3. Ex stories
If you’re not directly asked, don’t become involved in previous relationships. According to a recent survey conducted by the dating site and app Zoosk on what information is appropriate to divulge and when, nearly half of singles believe that past relationships, even recent breakups, should not be mentioned until after a few weeks of dating has passed.
Sometimes there’s a fine line between modesty and low self-esteem. On the first date, it’s a bad idea to reveal all of your flaws. It’s also a turnoff to make jokes about how horrible you are at dating. It’s fine to acknowledge you’re apprehensive, but telling a guy on a first date that you’re terrible at dating is akin to the director announcing the film’s failure before it ever starts. It kills the other person’s interest or motivation.
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First dates may be awful, but they can be amazing too. What if you find yourself falling for this guy? Would you want him to like you then?
That’s when you should understand men. You see, to fall in love with a woman, a man must feel like her defender and provider. In other words, he has to feel like your hero. Then, his protective instinct will be triggered, and he’ll have no choice but to ask you out. It will also elicit his deepest feelings of desire and affection.
What I’m talking about here has a psychological term for it. It’s the relationship psychologist James Bauer who invented the term “hero instinct”.
In his most recent free video, James outlines the phrases, texts, and small requests you may use to activate his hero instinct. It’s also good studying these emotional trigger points as no man can resist a woman who makes him feel like a hero.
If you want to learn more, check out my review of “His Secret Obsession” to understand how this book can truly help you in your love life.
There’s no denying that first dates are difficult and unpleasant at times. So it’s fine to stumble and make a few blunders when it comes to having a successful first date conversation.
However, if you keep chatting, remember these guidelines of what to talk about on your first date with a guy (and what to avoid as first date topics). Simply focus on getting to know the other person and you could be surprised at how smoothly the conversation flows.